Dear diarrhea,

Josie came into the office while I was on the computer and said:

Josie:"I need a pen for my diarrhea"

Me: "You need a what?"

Josie, more forcefully: "I need a pen for my diarrhea"

I then looked down to see her holding up a little notebook from the dollar store, then I bust out laughing.

She got angrier: "Mom, not funny, I need a pen for my diarrhea"

So I offered her a pencil, but that wasn't good enough for her diarrhea.